Relapse May 11, 2016 18:45:27 GMT
Post by Susan Peabody on May 11, 2016 18:45:27 GMT
I wrote The Art of Changing at the height of my recovery. Then I promptly proceeded to relapse. One of the first signs was when I started yelling again.
In my book, I use the example of how I had learned, with the help of God, how to stop yelling. Then my sister Nancy moved in and all hell broke loose.
Nancy Arlene Morris in my older sister. She has a twin named Cheryl. Nancy left her husband years ago because he had raped my daughter Kathy, and when my mother died she moved in with Cheryl. Then Cheryl died of liver cancer and everything fell apart. My mother had taken good care of Nancy. But when they both died her care fell to my sister's children: my nieces. Cheryl, unfortunately, had not taught her children to care for themselves, and they went down hill quickly. They put a life time of antiques that belonged to my mother in storage and they were lost. They turned to drugs and ended up in jail. My niece lost her two children to social services. (It is a long, tedious story that I will tell someday.)
Anyway, my sister was taken by the police to a nursing home and they sent her to the hospital. This is where I found her. The doctor's called to ask if I wanted to resuscitate her. When I called her she simply said, "Hi."
At first I thought I could handle this by putting Nancy in a nursing home. But she did not thrive so I ended up bringing her home to stay with me.
At first, this was a disaster. I was so angry at my sister for enabling her husband to rape my daughter Kathy that the very sight of her triggered me. This led to yelling and later abuse.
Then, I had my second spiritual transformation that I have already talked about and everything change. The anger and hate dissipated. My love for her came back. My appreciation for what she does to help out around the house became apparent. The yelling stopped (with one or two slips) and all is well with us today. Nancy and Frank and I are a nice little family. We live together, and may soon pray together. We all have a strong faith that we will be taken care of us and that everything that has happened for a reason. Chaos is but part of God's plan. There is "method in the madness" as they used to say.
May 9, 2016